Barmy Army Songbook

Australian Players
Songbook

He Bowls to the Left (Mitchell Johnson)

He bowls to the left...
He bowls to the rightttttttt
That Mitchell Johnson
His bowling is shite!

I Can't Read (Ricky Ponting)

I can't read and I can't write
I must be Australian
I can't read and I can't write
I must be Australian

I can't bowl and I can't bat
My names Ricky Ponting
I can't drink and I can't fight
My names Ricky Ponting

Langer Is An Aussie (Justin Langer)

Langer is an Aussie
He wears the gold and green
He is the biggest whinger
That we have ever seen

He wasn't very happy
When we called Brett Lee's no ball
He's got a very big mouth
And he's only five feet tall

Ponting, without Mcgrath and Warne (Ricky Ponting)

To the tune of Colonel Bogey

Ponting, without Mcgrath and Warne
Is hopeless and only 5ft tall
He's skipper but now so bitter
As we claim the Ashes once more

Red-nosed captain (Ricky Ponting)

To the Tune of Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer

"Ricky the red-faced captain
Leads a side in trouble and strife
Both he and Ryan Harris
Couldn't score to save their life

Strauss and his Pommie team mates
Cooky, Bell and Kevin P
Showed how the Aussies are now
The worst team in their history"

Siddle by Siddle (Peter Siddle)

(to the tune of Little by Little)

Siddle by Siddle,
You bowl us everything we ever dreamed of,
Siddle by Siddle,
The wheels of your team are slowly falling off,
Siddle by Siddle,
You always bowl a ball that goes for 4,
And all the time,
Ponting asks himself why, are you really here?

Why are you really here?
Why are you really here?
Why are you really here?

And one for Ian Bell that Gaz says may need a bit of work

Call out the Sherminator,
There's some swing in the air,
He's gonna get a ton sooner or later,
If you keep on bowling there,
Bell is dy-na-mite!

The Johnson Family (Mitchell Johnson)

His mother hates his missus
His missus hates his mother
They all hate each other
The Johnson Family
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